Modern women of today are defined by their charm, intellect, appearance, and personal abilities. Women are challenged everyday by difficult choices based on self image, career choices, and relationships. Modern women are becoming the power houses of the 21st century, however, if women can take on the White House, why is it so hard to find the right companion?
As a 19-year-old woman in a Hispanic culture, getting married should be the number one priority, however, finding the right guy to even consider as a prospect is most complicated.
Almost every woman in my extended family has thought about getting married with the right man and becoming the perfect housewife. Even though getting married is the most natural thing for humans to do, it becomes such a difficult step to overcome. Not being able to find the right guy is the thought that concerns me most. Almost every day I hear about another couple that divorced or find couples that are cheating on each other. It is disillusioning to see so many relationship problems and not know whether I’ll have that same fate.
Not only is finding the right guy a problem, but being able to form a good relationship. How does a woman talk to a man without looking too desperate or forward? I have come across many women around campus that feel that starting a wholesome conversation with a man is can become a very confusing situation.
“I find it very difficult to talk to a guy that works at the library. He seems so laid back and mysterious, but how do I get him to talk to me?” explained a dear friend of mine.
Most women have felt like this at one time or another. Communication with men has never been an easy task. If a woman talks too much, then she becomes annoying and if she is too nice then she is too emotional. The inner working of man’s mind is very complex, but what is a woman to do? How is she supposed to find the right man without feeling emotionally deprived or just utterly unattractive?
Magazines like Marie Claire and Cosmopolitan instruct women on how to independently better their careers, fashion, fitness, and home life. Finding the right shoes that are comfortable and look good are hard enough, let alone finding the right guy.
According to Jaclyn Geller, Here comes the Bride: Women, Weddings, and the Marriage Mystique, “Televised daytime talk shows have become venues for husband hunting advisors, and the popular psychology branch of the publishing industry panders increasingly to “single” women, offering a range of strategies for snagging a male partner.”
Modern women are not only becoming leaders of tomorrow, but have turned a new leaf when searching for the next Mr. Right. It has come to my attention, that women are no longer basing their principles on money or looks, but on intelligence, kindness, conversation, and the ability to make the coldest of hearts laugh. Sexy bodies and good hair are a thing of the past. Sure good looking men are always desired, but good looks are not going to keep a woman happy.
Another very important consideration when looking for a possible soul mate, as was brought to me by an interesting woman, is body odor. A man will most probably not be appreciated if he mysteriously disguises body odor with cologne.
“I prefer a man who can appreciate me for who I am and not judge me for what I look like. He should be able to make me laugh but listen to me when ever I have a problem and should also be willing to state his own opinion, even if we fight,” stated a concerned acquaintance.
Higher standards set by women on future husbands could be one of the reasons love seeking is so complicated, but women have undergone so many obstacles is society; why should we not get what we deserve or want? The concept of men becoming intimidated by powerful women is very interesting for my-self and other women to comprehend. Could intimidated men be a reason for women who are looking for a possible soul mate to hit a dead end?
After talking to numerous women, my concern on relationships quickly took a turn.
Do men on campus feel the same way? Is there a particular reason for women to find it hard to talk to men? In order to find a solution to these concerns, I would really appreciate if all the TAMIU male students on campus would to respond to these questions at journalism@tamiu.edu. I do feel that questions should never be left unanswered, so to all the brave men out there who think that there is a possible solution to any of these questions, I highly recommend you to answer this article. I believe that together we can come to an agreement as to what makes a relationship work, what both men and women want in a relationship, and easier methods of starting a relationship.